THIS IS NOT SATIRE
Hunter Biden’s life ended Friday morning at 8:00 a.m. when the U.S. Navy Judge Advocate General’s Corps in cooperation with the Office of Military Commissions hanged him to death. His execution happened only a few weeks after a military tribunal at Guantanamo Bay found him guilty of treason—a capital offense—and a myriad of sex crimes against underage women.
Hunter Biden’s last hours alive were remarkably like those of other Deep State agents. He was awoken at 6:00 a.m. and offered a last meal. Then, GITMO security escorted him to the exit of Camp Delta where a Humvee and three armed Marines awaited his arrival. He was then driven to GITMO’s southern edge, where the same gallows from which Bill Gates had been hanged earlier this month loomed before him.
Around the gallows stood a small assembly of military brass—Rear Adm. Crandall, Marine Corps General David H. Berger, and U.S. Army lieutenant General Johnathon P. Braga, commanding officer, U.S. Army Special Forces Command.
A Naval chaplain and an anonymous soldier, who manned the gallows, stood atop the platform.
RRN has been asked to keep confidential the names of other high-ranking officers in attendance.
After Biden ascended the shallow flight of steps leading to the platform and had a noose slipped around his neck, Rear Adm. Crandall asked if he had any last words, or wanted to give a statement of contrition.
“You can’t do this to me; I’m a civilian. I’m not a politician. I’m not in the game,” said a defiant Biden.
“Game?” Rear Adm. Crandall queried. “You’re about to be hanged, Mr. Biden, and you’re talking of games. You probably thought this was a chess game and saw yourself as a rook or even the queen. You were always a pawn, and you put yourself in the game, as you put it, and you ran amok, afoul of everything this country is supposed to stand for.”
“It was all Barack. He’s calling all the shots. He’s behind everything from Covid-19 to a tanking economy to wanting to see the country tear itself apart. All I ever did was have some fun,” Biden pleaded as the anonymous soldier tightened the noose.
“The time for telling us what we already know is over,” Rear Adm. Crandall said.
The chaplain gave Last Rites, and a moment later the trap door swung open beneath Biden’s feet. His neck snapped.
“I don’t take any sense of perverse pleasure in overseeing these executions,” Rear Adm. Crandall told the assembly. “But justice today has been served.”